A month without blogging! I have been slack :(
I'll recap now, not much has been happening, Miss Em has learned how to roll from back to tummy, but gets stuck on her tummy and can't figure out how to get back over lol
She is also giggling and laughing at random things now, she loves her big brother and sister and laughs at them both on a regular basis.
Matt has discovered that he has bad gallstones as well and will be seeing the surgeon in January in preparation for surgery to have his gallbladder removed.
Master J is his usual hyperactive crazy self, he will be turning 4 in 7 days! I can't believe how quickly the past 4 years have gone by, I miss the little baby he used to be, and now he's growing up so fast and turning into a real little man :'( makes me want to cry that my baby boy is growing up so quickly.
Princess E is turning into a Prissy Girl, she doesn't like being told "No" or being told off and if it happens her bottom lip goes out, starts wobbling and she bursts into tears. She loves her Pink Butterfly Sequin sandles, and her pretty dresses, though she still likes to play with Master J's Chuggington trains and Hot Wheels cars lol
As for me, I ended up getting an infection behind my belly button incision almost 2 weeks ago and was on antibiotics (It was sooo painful! And red and hot to touch, I felt so horrid and sick), and now I have Pharyngitis (a throat infection) with a nasty cough after having this cold (yes a cold in SUMMER of all seasons) for the past 5 weeks.
Not much else has been happening, we are managing to stay comfortable financially this year, the first time in quite a while that we haven't had to worry about our finances around Christmas (the last few years we have had to ask for help the the St Vincent De Paul Society in the form of food vouchers just to get us over the Christmas/New Year period while hubby wasn't working.
I can't thank the St Vinnies Charity and it's volunteers enough for the help they have given us over the past few years, they are amazing and do so much for people who really need the help. I regularly shop at our local St Vinnies Op Shop and donate many of our old clothes and household items that while still in good condition we just don't need anymore (all my size 20 clothes for example were recently sent to St Vinnies as I am currently a size 16-18 - I am hoping to get down to a size 14 soonish though lol).
In regards to my weightloss journey, the first 2 weeks after my gallbladder was removed I only put on the 100g (I know I've put this in a previous blog entry but here it is again - prior to surgery I was putting on 1.5kg a fortnight on average), and since then I haven't gained any weight at all (and that is with eating some bad things every couple of days lol including a whole pack of caramel TimTams and half a pack of Lamingtons!) and have even lost 1cm off my waist! I get weighed again on monday, so hopefully I will have lost a bit of weight this fortnight (and another 1cm off my waist, it's certainly looking a bit smaller, I can't see it past my boobs unless I lean forwards slightly now! lol).
Anyway, it is currently 12:35am and I need to get some sleep as I was up until 5am yesterday morning with insomnia and only got 3.5 hours sleep.
Night all!
Jen - xoxo
Saturday, 15 December 2012
Sunday, 11 November 2012
Update
I haven't updated in a while as things have been busy so I'll do a quick recap.
Mattt went on the Barry Sheen run to Phillip Island and the moto GP last month and had a blast. It was hard being on my own with all 3 kids and I was really stressed out while he was gone, so much do that I had a gallstone attack the night before he got home and was in hospital for around 6 hours.
After he got back I had an ultrasound which showed 3 visible gallstones measuring 1cm to 1.25cm in size, and my GP told ke it wasnt bad enough to fo anything yet and to just keep going as normal. I had another 5 gallstone attacks in the space of 8 days,after that first one, the last attack was in the early hours of the morning last tuesday, only 6 days ago, and even morphine didn't take the pain away so I went in for emergency surgery at 1:30pm on tuesday afternoon.
I wasn't able to express or feed Emily for over 24 hours so my supply has suffered and I am slowly trying to build it back up.
So today I am 6 days post surgery and still in pain, I can't relax or take it easy like I am supposed to because Matt has to work and I have to look after the kids.
My family isn't helping at all, my Mother-in-Law took the kids for a few days for hich i am extremely grateful, but my side of the family couldnt really care less except my mum, dad and aunt who are all busy with work and can't get down here to help.
My stepmum hasnt even bothered to calk up and ask how I am goung or visit, I'm ready to write off most of my family right now.
Anyway that is all for now.
Jen.
Mattt went on the Barry Sheen run to Phillip Island and the moto GP last month and had a blast. It was hard being on my own with all 3 kids and I was really stressed out while he was gone, so much do that I had a gallstone attack the night before he got home and was in hospital for around 6 hours.
After he got back I had an ultrasound which showed 3 visible gallstones measuring 1cm to 1.25cm in size, and my GP told ke it wasnt bad enough to fo anything yet and to just keep going as normal. I had another 5 gallstone attacks in the space of 8 days,after that first one, the last attack was in the early hours of the morning last tuesday, only 6 days ago, and even morphine didn't take the pain away so I went in for emergency surgery at 1:30pm on tuesday afternoon.
I wasn't able to express or feed Emily for over 24 hours so my supply has suffered and I am slowly trying to build it back up.
So today I am 6 days post surgery and still in pain, I can't relax or take it easy like I am supposed to because Matt has to work and I have to look after the kids.
My family isn't helping at all, my Mother-in-Law took the kids for a few days for hich i am extremely grateful, but my side of the family couldnt really care less except my mum, dad and aunt who are all busy with work and can't get down here to help.
My stepmum hasnt even bothered to calk up and ask how I am goung or visit, I'm ready to write off most of my family right now.
Anyway that is all for now.
Jen.
Saturday, 20 October 2012
A Mothers Pain
I have been busy so I haven't had the chance to update for a bit.
Today marks 19 months since a friend, gave birth to and said goodbye to her precious baby girl, Haylz.
I have been blessed at being permitted to see a photo of her.
Haylz was beautiful. her full lips, chubby cheeks, thick black hair. Haylz was pure perfection. And now she is a perfect angel in heaven or wherever it is that souls go.
I don't believe in a God, but I do believe that there is something out there that we as humans can't truly fathom, whether it is a god or goddess, or something else entirely. I choose to call it a goddess personally, with no name and no benevolent or violent nature. Call it nature in its raw form or Mother Earth if you like.
If i had believed in the God that dominates our society I would have stopped believing the day that Haylz passed away. How can any henevolent God take away the life of an innocent baby? How can any God who supposedly loves us destroy that little family, and all the other families who have lost babies, in that way?
And for those who say that God has his reasons, well that is a load of complete bullshit. There is no reason for it.
To lose a child is to spend the rest of yours days in a living hell with constant reminders of everything that you have lost - that first smile, the first time your baby rolls over, crawls, the first steps, first day of school, graduation, seeing that child get married and have children of his or her own. Just seeing pregnant woman and young babies down the street is a bleak reminder of everything you have lost.
My friend was blessed at the beginning of this year with her rainbow baby, a little boy, but her pain is still fresh, and I can only imagine that when she sees all the other babies in our baby buddies group, and hears of what they are up to and learning, that her loss is even more pronounced because Haylz should be here doing all the things that Elise and the other toddlers are doing.
I can't continue any further as I am too upset.
Until next time,
Jen - xoxo
Today marks 19 months since a friend, gave birth to and said goodbye to her precious baby girl, Haylz.
I have been blessed at being permitted to see a photo of her.
Haylz was beautiful. her full lips, chubby cheeks, thick black hair. Haylz was pure perfection. And now she is a perfect angel in heaven or wherever it is that souls go.
I don't believe in a God, but I do believe that there is something out there that we as humans can't truly fathom, whether it is a god or goddess, or something else entirely. I choose to call it a goddess personally, with no name and no benevolent or violent nature. Call it nature in its raw form or Mother Earth if you like.
If i had believed in the God that dominates our society I would have stopped believing the day that Haylz passed away. How can any henevolent God take away the life of an innocent baby? How can any God who supposedly loves us destroy that little family, and all the other families who have lost babies, in that way?
And for those who say that God has his reasons, well that is a load of complete bullshit. There is no reason for it.
To lose a child is to spend the rest of yours days in a living hell with constant reminders of everything that you have lost - that first smile, the first time your baby rolls over, crawls, the first steps, first day of school, graduation, seeing that child get married and have children of his or her own. Just seeing pregnant woman and young babies down the street is a bleak reminder of everything you have lost.
My friend was blessed at the beginning of this year with her rainbow baby, a little boy, but her pain is still fresh, and I can only imagine that when she sees all the other babies in our baby buddies group, and hears of what they are up to and learning, that her loss is even more pronounced because Haylz should be here doing all the things that Elise and the other toddlers are doing.
I can't continue any further as I am too upset.
Until next time,
Jen - xoxo
Thursday, 4 October 2012
News
It has been a,few,days or so since my last blog entry, and a few things have happened.
First my Oma (maternal grandmother) had a fall and broke her hip, she was stuck on the floor for 2 days before my aunt found her. Shes 88 years old, a heavy smoker and lives on her own, so she's done well to get this far without something serious like this happening. She gave us all a huge scare, we didnt think she would make it through the surgery to pin her hip back together, we are very glad that she did.
Her only visitors so far have been my uncle and us, she's getting a bit lonely in hospital on her own.
To say she looks like hell is an understatement.
Because of this my mum is coming down from QLD to help out, so she will finally be able to meet Emily for the first time. She is driving down and arrives tonight but we won't see her until tomorrow.
In other news Emily had to have some blood tests done yesterday to check her Vitamin D levels, lipids and thyroid because when I was pregnant with her my vitamin D levels were dangerously low but no one told me until after she was born.
Today she saw the paediatrician and we got the results, the good news is that she won't have to see the paediatrician again but the bad news is that her vitamin D levels are only 45 and the minimum of the healthy range is 50 so she has to stay on Pentavite (a childrens multivitamin that is highin Vitamin D) until she is 12 months old.
Tomorrow i am meeting my bestie in Traralgon and we will be going shopping for dresses for the girls to wear this summer, which after the heat we had today (30 degrees celcius) summer is going to be really hot!
That's all for now, until next time,
Jen - xoxo
First my Oma (maternal grandmother) had a fall and broke her hip, she was stuck on the floor for 2 days before my aunt found her. Shes 88 years old, a heavy smoker and lives on her own, so she's done well to get this far without something serious like this happening. She gave us all a huge scare, we didnt think she would make it through the surgery to pin her hip back together, we are very glad that she did.
Her only visitors so far have been my uncle and us, she's getting a bit lonely in hospital on her own.
To say she looks like hell is an understatement.
Because of this my mum is coming down from QLD to help out, so she will finally be able to meet Emily for the first time. She is driving down and arrives tonight but we won't see her until tomorrow.
In other news Emily had to have some blood tests done yesterday to check her Vitamin D levels, lipids and thyroid because when I was pregnant with her my vitamin D levels were dangerously low but no one told me until after she was born.
Today she saw the paediatrician and we got the results, the good news is that she won't have to see the paediatrician again but the bad news is that her vitamin D levels are only 45 and the minimum of the healthy range is 50 so she has to stay on Pentavite (a childrens multivitamin that is highin Vitamin D) until she is 12 months old.
Tomorrow i am meeting my bestie in Traralgon and we will be going shopping for dresses for the girls to wear this summer, which after the heat we had today (30 degrees celcius) summer is going to be really hot!
That's all for now, until next time,
Jen - xoxo
Friday, 28 September 2012
I've Come So Far Already
A few weeks ago when I started writing this blog I was in a very dark place. Looking back I can't help but compare it to the way I felt as a teenager when I was teased and felt isolated and alone even among friends, the way I always felt after each loss, the way I felt while I was pregnant with Elise, and it was the most like the way I felt when I was in the deep dark place after losing Tomas.
So even though I'm feeling a lot better emotionally I'm still left with the question "When will I get over this pain of never having another baby?" I really need to know! How long will it take for me to be able to look at a pregnant woman without feeling this horrible jealousy, this pain, anger and frustration?
I don't know why I'm still feeling like that, I hate feeling like this. I want to be normal again.
Back to other news, I have a new phone so I will be able to post some pics in future blog entries.
My driving is still going well, I've made a few errors but it's all part of learning and I haven't crashed the car yet or hit anyone so that's a good thing!
Wednesday next week I will be driving us up to Matt's parents place in Seaspray for an overnight visit to the beach since Thursday is supposed to be really nice and warm. Hope the weather forecast stays the same and doesn't change to "cold with rain", I've had enough of cold and rain after todays weather.
That's it for now. Until next time,
Jenna - xoxo
So even though I'm feeling a lot better emotionally I'm still left with the question "When will I get over this pain of never having another baby?" I really need to know! How long will it take for me to be able to look at a pregnant woman without feeling this horrible jealousy, this pain, anger and frustration?
I don't know why I'm still feeling like that, I hate feeling like this. I want to be normal again.
Back to other news, I have a new phone so I will be able to post some pics in future blog entries.
My driving is still going well, I've made a few errors but it's all part of learning and I haven't crashed the car yet or hit anyone so that's a good thing!
Wednesday next week I will be driving us up to Matt's parents place in Seaspray for an overnight visit to the beach since Thursday is supposed to be really nice and warm. Hope the weather forecast stays the same and doesn't change to "cold with rain", I've had enough of cold and rain after todays weather.
That's it for now. Until next time,
Jenna - xoxo
Tuesday, 25 September 2012
On A High
Today I am on a bit of a high, I managed to get some things done that I've been wanting to do for a bit.
I managed to get most of the rodent cages cleaned out.
The veggie patch has been dug over and I purchased seedlings yesterday which I planted in it today - Tomatoes, Zucchini, Cucumber, Peas, Carrots, Celery, Spinach and Lettuce. Soon I will plant the seeds that I have (peas, tomatoes and lettuce) into trays to try and grow them too. I still have to buy some leaks, broccoli and cauliflower to plant as well, and I might get some spring onions and a few other things next fortnight if I can find things that I like.
I also started tidying up my study today and packing things that I don't need right now away.
Tomorrow Jaycen has a morning session at daycare so I will be catching up on the dishes and hopefully do some more tidying in my study.
My driving has been going well too, although there are still many things I need to work on (not cutting people off by accident is the main thing) and just as many things still to learn (reverse and parallel parking for example), but I am finally at the point where I am really looking forward to going driving, and to being able to drive on my own without Matt in the car. We have talked about the car as well, Matt would like to get a twin-cab ute at some point, and I would like to have a smaller car (we currently have a station wagon, which while great for travelling distances with the kids and the dog I have a lot of trouble judging the length of the car and the distance between the back and front of the car and things around us while driving) so there are a lot of things to think about for my driving future.
On Thursday I am hoping that my best friend Janelle will come to visit, it is supposed to be 27 degrees C, a beautiful spring day! So we have plans to spend the day outside beading while Matt plays with the kids and does some painting with them. And I am hoping Janelle will join me on Saturday for the local Rodent Fanciers Picnic. I am taking one of my girl rats and her babies along, and might take some of the baby mice as well since some of them will be available for sale in a few weeks. Apparently one of the Melbourne rat breeders is coming down to visit all of us Gippsland rodent lovers, it will be interesting to have a chat with her and learn more about her breeding methods. I would love to bring some new rats home with me, but I am not allowed to as I am in the process of reducing my numbers while working on the health of my lines and producing younger rats to breed from in future.
On Sunday it will be the NRL Grand Final, and the Rugby team that we support, the Melbourne Storm, is playing, so Matt has set up the shed and connected the set-top box and aerial to the projector so that we (us and some of our friends) can watch it live on the 7ft projector screen with the wood fire going if it gets cold.
I am looking forward to it, and I really hope that Storm wins since we lost our place in the Grand Final last year due to a salary cap scandal within the NRL (Storm were used as the scapegoat even though every other club was doing it too, some worse than Storm). So we will be kept busy getting ready for it.
Emily is asleep in the bouncer at the moment, so I am catching up on watching episode 4 of "Call The Midwife" which I missed on Sunday.
Until next time,
Jenna - xoxo
I managed to get most of the rodent cages cleaned out.
The veggie patch has been dug over and I purchased seedlings yesterday which I planted in it today - Tomatoes, Zucchini, Cucumber, Peas, Carrots, Celery, Spinach and Lettuce. Soon I will plant the seeds that I have (peas, tomatoes and lettuce) into trays to try and grow them too. I still have to buy some leaks, broccoli and cauliflower to plant as well, and I might get some spring onions and a few other things next fortnight if I can find things that I like.
I also started tidying up my study today and packing things that I don't need right now away.
Tomorrow Jaycen has a morning session at daycare so I will be catching up on the dishes and hopefully do some more tidying in my study.
My driving has been going well too, although there are still many things I need to work on (not cutting people off by accident is the main thing) and just as many things still to learn (reverse and parallel parking for example), but I am finally at the point where I am really looking forward to going driving, and to being able to drive on my own without Matt in the car. We have talked about the car as well, Matt would like to get a twin-cab ute at some point, and I would like to have a smaller car (we currently have a station wagon, which while great for travelling distances with the kids and the dog I have a lot of trouble judging the length of the car and the distance between the back and front of the car and things around us while driving) so there are a lot of things to think about for my driving future.
On Thursday I am hoping that my best friend Janelle will come to visit, it is supposed to be 27 degrees C, a beautiful spring day! So we have plans to spend the day outside beading while Matt plays with the kids and does some painting with them. And I am hoping Janelle will join me on Saturday for the local Rodent Fanciers Picnic. I am taking one of my girl rats and her babies along, and might take some of the baby mice as well since some of them will be available for sale in a few weeks. Apparently one of the Melbourne rat breeders is coming down to visit all of us Gippsland rodent lovers, it will be interesting to have a chat with her and learn more about her breeding methods. I would love to bring some new rats home with me, but I am not allowed to as I am in the process of reducing my numbers while working on the health of my lines and producing younger rats to breed from in future.
On Sunday it will be the NRL Grand Final, and the Rugby team that we support, the Melbourne Storm, is playing, so Matt has set up the shed and connected the set-top box and aerial to the projector so that we (us and some of our friends) can watch it live on the 7ft projector screen with the wood fire going if it gets cold.
I am looking forward to it, and I really hope that Storm wins since we lost our place in the Grand Final last year due to a salary cap scandal within the NRL (Storm were used as the scapegoat even though every other club was doing it too, some worse than Storm). So we will be kept busy getting ready for it.
Emily is asleep in the bouncer at the moment, so I am catching up on watching episode 4 of "Call The Midwife" which I missed on Sunday.
Until next time,
Jenna - xoxo
Sunday, 23 September 2012
Driving Lessons + Elise walking and new words
Not much to report really, I did go driving again the other day, just to the shops and back again.
I went driving yesterday too, and again today.
I now have 7 hours and 14 minutes of driving experience, only another 112 hours and 46 minutes left until I will feel comfortable going for my Probationary License, so my goal of getting it by this time next year is well within reach, though Matt is hoping I get it earlier, say by February next year. We shall see.
Other news is that Elise is finally walking everywhere on her own instead of walking while holding onto furniture and the walls. She really started doing it 3 days ago just by walking in circles around the lounge room, and now she is confident enough to walk everywhere but can only walk for short stretches before she needs to have a rest.
She has also learned 2 new words - Cool and Uh-Oh, she is having some trouble pronouncing them properly and getting the right pitch but considering she will be 18 months old on the 30th and was only saying "Mum-mum", "Dad-dad", "Nan-nan", "Bub-bub", "Bot-Bot" and "Pretty" before now it is about time she learnt a new word.
Me, I am feeling a bit better emotionally today, although I am very tired and just want to sleep a lot which I can't do right now. I did manage to have a mostly undisturbed shower this morning by putting the bouncer in the bathroom and having Emily in it where she could see me and putting a "My Little Pony" DVD on for Jaycen and Elise.
Jaycen is in love with My Little Pony at the moment, although I am getting tired of hearing "I want the ponies on again! turn the ponies on again!" every time the DVD finishes, that and the DVD gets extremely boring after 100 repetitions lol
I have purchased 9 new My Little Pony DVDs off eBay, so hopefully they will arrive this coming week and we can watch something new. I am revisiting my childhood with 5 of these DVDs, 4 of which are the original My Little Pony Tales episodes in DVD form (from the 1990's), 4 are the generation 3-3.5 style DVDs (2000's) and 1 is the original movie. I hope the kids like them as much as they like the current "Twinkle Wish Adventure" DVD.
Well that is it for now, I have to go and start getting some things ready for dinner tonight - Squid Tubes stuffed with CousCous with a Chilli-Lime yoghurt dressing, Yummo!
Until next time,
Jen - xoxo
I went driving yesterday too, and again today.
I now have 7 hours and 14 minutes of driving experience, only another 112 hours and 46 minutes left until I will feel comfortable going for my Probationary License, so my goal of getting it by this time next year is well within reach, though Matt is hoping I get it earlier, say by February next year. We shall see.
Other news is that Elise is finally walking everywhere on her own instead of walking while holding onto furniture and the walls. She really started doing it 3 days ago just by walking in circles around the lounge room, and now she is confident enough to walk everywhere but can only walk for short stretches before she needs to have a rest.
She has also learned 2 new words - Cool and Uh-Oh, she is having some trouble pronouncing them properly and getting the right pitch but considering she will be 18 months old on the 30th and was only saying "Mum-mum", "Dad-dad", "Nan-nan", "Bub-bub", "Bot-Bot" and "Pretty" before now it is about time she learnt a new word.
Me, I am feeling a bit better emotionally today, although I am very tired and just want to sleep a lot which I can't do right now. I did manage to have a mostly undisturbed shower this morning by putting the bouncer in the bathroom and having Emily in it where she could see me and putting a "My Little Pony" DVD on for Jaycen and Elise.
Jaycen is in love with My Little Pony at the moment, although I am getting tired of hearing "I want the ponies on again! turn the ponies on again!" every time the DVD finishes, that and the DVD gets extremely boring after 100 repetitions lol
I have purchased 9 new My Little Pony DVDs off eBay, so hopefully they will arrive this coming week and we can watch something new. I am revisiting my childhood with 5 of these DVDs, 4 of which are the original My Little Pony Tales episodes in DVD form (from the 1990's), 4 are the generation 3-3.5 style DVDs (2000's) and 1 is the original movie. I hope the kids like them as much as they like the current "Twinkle Wish Adventure" DVD.
Well that is it for now, I have to go and start getting some things ready for dinner tonight - Squid Tubes stuffed with CousCous with a Chilli-Lime yoghurt dressing, Yummo!
Until next time,
Jen - xoxo
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